Ultrasounds scans...good or bad?

This month I attended an Obstetric/Gynaecology/Midwifery conference in Dubai, at the World Trade Centre as a keynote speaker. Impressive venue it certainly was, but as I made my way to the room where the midwifery delegates would attend, I noticed that the majority of exhibitors in the exhibition hall were demonstrating ultrasound scanning machines.

The benefits of ultrasound in pregnancy are undoubtedly useful in supporting a journey resulting in a healthy mother and baby. But we are still unaware of the side effects of the diagnostic intervention, and it is my firm belief that they are used too freely in some instances.

There are documented concerns about the side effects of ultrasound, and these include excessive heat to fetal tissue and high frequency sounds transmitted to the fetus. There are also suggested links to the rise in Autism. But prospective parents are unaware of the potential dangers, and some are now engaging in activities to receive the test for reasons other than diagnostic.

For example, many of the machines on display in Dubai were 4D scanners which provide parents with in utero photographs.  The poor developing baby is prodded and poked to enable a good image to satisfy impatient couples, and some are going one step further and holding fetus parties to show off their newly acquired unborn baby photos!

The CEO of the Royal College of Midwives , Cathy Warwick,recently condemned the activity  and I certainly have to agree with the reasons she gives.

But the large companies developing and marketing the machines are intent on selling them to make money. And the human race continues to disturb nature without taking a moment to consider the consequences.....

My Dad

Last night I dreamt about my lovely Dad, and today I feel as though I have been with him again. The dream was so very real and vivid; I could see the lines on his face and the twinkle in his eye as he smiled. I was slightly annoyed with him, as he’s had a pint of beer too many (which he often did) and was repeating himself (which he often did), but nonetheless I was absolutely thrilled to see him. Dad died in 1979, so his memory including his facial expressions and personality must be firmly embedded in my mind and being, and I couldn’t help thinking when I woke this morning with a smile that the imprint will be gone forever one day. His actually image that is. Although so many of the children of his five girls look like Jim Murray, if not exactly then they are the owner of his ears, or his deep set Irish eyes. Not morbid, just fact! Oh Dad, you really did miss so much. What you started when you emigrated from Ireland over 70 years ago couldn’t have been dreamed about. I can’t tell you everything here, but you would have laughed more than cried. And do you remember how you used to brag about us all? Well you would’ve have had plenty of that to do, let me tell you. So for today you are a recent memory in my mind and I feel like I was with you last night. Tomorrow will be a different story. Always loved. Always missed.

Am I a feminist? Hmm....

 

It's our second visit to the United Arab Emirates and we are totally enjoying being with our lovely friends Grace and Rob. We were here in October and visited the Grand Mosque with interest, and learnt a little about the culture. One thing for sure, every visit certainly tests my beliefs and values. The message from the Sheikh Khalifa, ruler of the UAE, is one of respect for others, for humanity. I see that, but I am astounded at the ever present class divide and my heart sinks at the gender inequality that stares me in the face. I am never in a position to judge, who am I after all? And I ask myself, am I a feminist? The answer is debatable, but I do know that my mother's words to her five girls gives me the confidence that she would have the same view as me.

Sweeping clean

It doesn't seem that long ago since Anna was 7 and performing a ballet characterisation of Tom joins the Water babies at dance festivals. We loved watching her little feet move carefully and gracefully and always had our hearts in our mouths as she had to negotiate the change from chimney sweep to water baby whilst still dancing! Today I was reminded of those special times when Acorn came to sweep our chimney and the brush popped out of the pot on the roof, towards to sky. With a clean chimney we can now contemplate decorating the room.....

A ladybug and a new bike!

I have said many times how I am intrigued by the fabulous method of transport in Holland, aka fiets! Daphne has bought a second hand 'BAKFIET', and it looks brilliant. It seems all young families use these useful and cool bikes, as when we go to visit we never fail to be mesmerised as a parent and up to four children whiz by. Love it. I can't wait to try to manoeuvre it next time we go to Scheveningen, but that may be a little too tricky! Minnie and Quentin will enjoy I am sure...

And the little ladybug. A Dutch ladybird. James sent me this pic to demonstrate how good his new iPhone's camera is, but I loved the fact that I could see Minnie's little pink Ugg boots in the background. Wish you lived nearer to us M and Q....

England in Spring..time for a fresh start?

I've been contemplating changing from Posterous to Wordpress for some time. So it's March 2012 and the Spring is almost here...what better time to change? Not so sure. Some of the platform features are easier, some more difficult but I will just take my time and work through. I make take up the offer of a kindly Twitter friend @RR_Photo, who has expertise in WP.

Just had a great one to one at the Mac store in the Trafford Centre, Manchester. I can now integrate movies into my Keynote presentation..and may even use my iPhone to control the slides! Lot's to think about.

So back to Wordpress, or should I go to bed.....

Starting over, living life and the colours of India

We have just got back home from seeing a fabulous movie...The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. We laughed and cried and enjoyed the feast of colours that India brings when eyes rest upon it.

For me, the moral of the story was that no matter how old you are, it's never too late to be happy. To start over. To live life. The film is definately worth watching (especially for my age group). As well as relishing the acting skills of the veteran cast, the film made us want to go to India.

My sister Anne and her (and our) good friend Sheila love India, and visit every year to holiday and to help communities in various ways. Anna my daughter went to Ludhiana in India for her elective placement when she was training to be a midwife, and the memories she made are frequently recounted.

We will ever get there? I hope so. 

Photo courtesy of Copyright © 2008 India-4U.com

Champagne breakfast and rooftop fiz

We went off to Edinburgh for the weekend to see Colette and Peter, and we knew we'd be in for a treat as soon as we collected Andrena and Bill from their home in Waddington as morning broke on Friday. Andrena had made a feast, a REAL feast for breakfast...and the train had hardly left the station before the first bottle of fiz was popped open! And it was only 8.30 in the morning. Oh dear. Three empty bottles by the time we reached Waverely St Station.

The next 3 days were great fun, diamonds were checked out (not by me I might add), we dined at Le Monde on George St, relaxed at the Sheraton Hotel Spa (luxury of a different kind), danced until dawn with Colette's wonderful friends, and finished with an exclusive Sunday lunch in Harvey Nicks rooftop restaurant, overlooking Edinburgh Castle. 

As the train left the station for home, I wished I was staying a little longer in this magical, historic city.

Colette and Peter, what wonderful hosts you are!

Real nappies, washing lines and Henry V111

With Anna and Garry's baby due at the beginning of July, Olivia washed the 'real' nappies we bought her in preparation. This fabulous photo was taken as they dried on her washing line, and she whatsapped it to me. I had a great big smile when I saw it.

I remember as though it were yesterday soaking (in Napisan) nappies in a bucket after removing the soiled liner, and washing the white terry squares on a boil wash before proudly hanging them on the line, whatever the weather! I actually loved it. Even when I had two children in them, I enjoyed the process of making them clean again, folding them in different (and innovative) ways and snuggling them next to my little one's skin. What pleasure!

I remember Mum giving me the impression that using disposable nappies was a sign of a 'bad mother', but not sure if she really meant that? In any case, I succumbed to disposables when Olivia my fourth child was born, and although it was easier, I didn't get the same satisfaction at nappy change time.

And we know that real nappies are much better for the environment. Apparently, if King Henry V111 had had disposable nappies, they would still be around 'rotting' today.

And that is appalling.  

A springer spaniel weekend

My daughter's two dogs needed to be cared for this weekend, and I was in charge. Pip and Charlie are springer spaniels and I have to say they are too cute. It may seem normal to be raving about hounds, but those who really know me well are either laughing or in shock. You see I have never been a 'doggy' person, until I fell in love with these two.

So, I have walked them for miles and miles, through goarse and swamp land, round resevoirs and over the beautiful Pendle Hill with Yvonne and Rosie, and Gill and Meg. These energetic puppies are just so full of energy and affection, and we have enjoyed every minute of our time together. So strange for me, I now even talk to them.

Oh, and what a delicious meal we had last evening. The best Chinese meal ever at Yu and You. No wonder they won Gordan Ramsey's 'Best Chinese Restaurant' award 2010. Wonderfully delicious.

All in a week: a visitor from Scotland, Ben's Playtime, a spa in the city and the Calendar Girls.....

It seems so long ago that fabulous Colette arrived to spend a night with us, but it's only a week. Colette drove from Edinburgh and we immediatley slipped into the country to sip champagne. We went to Eaves Hall  to be disappointed as the venue is now open for weddings only! So off to Mitton Hall we went and we happily settled by the roaring fire. Not ususal for a weekday night, but what a fabulous evening, chatting and eating. Being a great positive thinker, Colette gave us lots to ponder on and she brightened our week in so many ways. Hilary invited us once more to Ben's Playtime on Thursday night at Benedicts in Whalley. A great opportunity to catch up with Frank and Lynne, but we partied a little too heavily and it took it's toll. What a great night though. I met a woman who lived near me as a child and we shared lots of memories. We danced and laughed and staggered home at 12.30-although the event finished at 9pm! F and L have an interesting story to tell about the way home.....

On Friday we set of to Kirkby Lonsdale, to enjoy a weekend with Gill and Mark. We had a blast. On Monday I was up and out of the house to catch the 07.46 train to Manchester, to meet with my lovely friend Debbie for a spa day at the MacDonalds hotel. Luxurious surroundings and much needed treatments were enjoyed by us both while we caught up on news and planned a new venture. On Tuesday I caught my breath.

Today, a week after Colette arrived, I was lucky enough to attend a charity dinner back at Mitton Hall, for MacMillan cancer support. Two of the Calendar Girls (Ros and Angela) gave an absolutely inspirational talk about their unique venture and my sisters Eileen and Anne and I were spellbound. We loved them. And I was lucky enough to be sat next to Jennie from Downham who coincidentally knows Emma Lee-Potter -in fact she lives in Emma's old house. It was so good that we could chat about our mutual appreciation of Emma's interesting blog...The House with No Name. What a small world.

And now I am in bed exhausted, but not too tired to watch the Calendar Girls movie...I only hope my eyes will stay open.

Kirkby Lonsdale and special people

It was literally by the skin of our teeth that we managed to book Rye Meadows for a weekend away with Gill and Mark. It was a belated silver wedding celebration, and how fabulously lucky we were. Gill is a teacher and wanted to go away at half term, so as we frantically tried to find vacancies our spirits took a dive; everyone else seemed to want this weekend too!

And then we stumbled accross a gem of a place just outside Kirkby Lonsdale. The apartment was everything and more that we could have possibly hoped for. It was modern, light, and perfectly kitted out with everything from chocolates, wine, fluffy pillows and spectaculor views of the Lune Valley. We couldn't believe it! And a perfect two nights and two days was to follow.....sheer bliss. Gill and Mark are special people. Mark is Paul's younger brother and Gill my extraordinary SiL (Sister-in-Law), and I couldn't have chosen a better one!! We walked and talked and ate and drank....saw the wonders of the sunny Yorkshire countryside from our temporary dwelling and whilst rambling over the hills from Settle to Long Preston on the way home. The walk into the historic market town of Kirkby Lonsdale was worth it; we bought a cheese board and new boots, and enjoyed (not) the company of Alan in the famous Royal Hotel. Oh dear! The quiz is still not complete! We made lots of memories didn't we? And we most certainly will be back!

A cat and Karl Marx

Liz and Wad and Paul and I spent our last morning together at Highgate Cemetry (East). The famous burial ground is not far from Julie and Chris's house, so we walked there and back before setting off for home. After a little fuss from PB about the entrance fee, we entered the Victorian graveyard that received it's first body (that of a 16 year old baker's daughter) in 1860. During the year I studied as a PhD student I was instructed on the teachings of Karl Marx, also buried here. Being a history teacher, Wad offered his account of Marx's life, which was far more animated and interesting than my philosophy class! He told us...

Karl Marx was a German 'thinker' and was influenced by Russian peasants and their rough deal in life. He believed that religion was used by the wealthy and elite to control the poor. He challenged capitalism and encouraged the manual workers of the world to participate in violent uprisings to change things. Marx had to leave his native land and he came to England. After visitng Salford he wrote 'Das Kapital'. He was interred at Highgate with his wife and grandchildren, alongside so many other famous individuals. Marx could never have predicted the longevity of his mark on our world.
I always find graveyards interesting. Not because I have a warped or morbid interest in death, but because I like to think that life is utterly meaningful and that each unique person's contribution should be remembered. We all pondered on various epitaphs, names, sculptures, photographs and messages. How fragile we all are. It was very cold in the graveyard, icy underfoot from the remains of the snow. We noticed a smart dark-haired distinguished looking gentleman walking down the main path with a Harrods bag and a bunch of flowers. He was on his way to tend to a grave, we could sense that, and the grave we were to discover was his son's. As we passed by we caught his eye and I bid him good morning. The grave he was lovingly caring for was full of flowers and plants, and there was an impressive red rose heart shaped flower arrangment in the middle of the grave with a sash saying 'Happy Birthday Son'. I commented that the flowers were beautiful. The man looked at me with sad brown eyes and said, 'well they are for my beautiful son, he deserves them'. I couldn't hold back the tears as I walked away. The grip of grief was evident in so many ways. The black and white cat stayed close by all the way round. We noticed him about a half way and although he wouldn't respond to my attempts to stroke him, he walked when we walked and stopped and rested as we took in some of the more interesting engravings. Obviously well cared for, I imagine this little animal has a lot of visitors....maybe some of a different world?

More bikes, and more snow

We walked and talked from our hotel to the town centre, all of us admiring the snow covered sites. The sky was blue, but it was SO COLD! One of the outdoor thermometers told us it was -8 but it felt much colder than that.....The fountain was frozen, and so were the bikes at Tilburg station.

James had joined us for coffee and love cake at Mugs and Muffins, and now we were off to Den Bosch for a spot of site seeing, on the recommendation of the lovely Anne. Liz and Wad were totally impressed at the number of bikes locked up at the station. This is a regular site at Dutch train stations, and I remembered vividly the first time I saw so many fliets together. Impressive eh?

We love Dutch bikes, and this fabulous way of travel.

This could only happen in Holland

We laughed when we caught site of a condom machine on the street, when walking into Tilburg town centre on Saturday. Quite sensible really. But then we realised the machine was mounted on a wall in between an exotic underwear store on one side, and a bedroom shop on the other. Intentional? Not sure.

It could only happen in Holland?

Tilburg, snow and loud music....

It took us three hours (instead of 90 minutes) to get to Tiburg by car. The snow was falling thick and fast and the roads were treacherous to say the least. Paul drove steadily and Wad navigated carefully. I carried on knitting and reading and listening to the marvellous tails of Liz! We arrived safe and sound, and after a short time to refresh we set off in search of food, and James Byrom! While ' resting' we marvelled at the cyclist....just as in Holland...continuing to cycle even in the blizzards. The cars were few, but the bikes kept on coming.

James now works in Tilburg at LIVE, so we were going to catch him playing. But first we met up with him and enjoyed an 'eat as much as you can' Japanese meal. Remember going there with you Gill and Mark? The atmostphere in the town was great, the lights reflected on the newly fallen snow perfectly, and we thoroughly enjoyed the strolling around. We arrived at LIVE around 10.30 just in time to hear Jim play, and we met (and heard) the new guy from Bolton (!) and Paul and Wad even had a dance! Great fun....even at our old age. 

Minnie and Quentin

Every time we come back to Holland Minnie and Quentin are just as happy to see us as we are them. It's amazing that the little ones have such great memories and huge capacity to love. Their small arms around our necks seem to belong there, and we enjoy each second. How they grow! Minnie is forever confident, she entered (and won!) the X Factor children's talent show so graciously. Quentin continues to be gentle and pensive, with a great sense of fun! He's not as keen as his big sister on the thespian activities though. 

Both children try their best to speak English to us which is so wonderful to hear. And I keep trying to improve my Dutch. Well, sort of!

We went into school with Minnie one morning and sat with her at her desk as she drew us a picture to take home to England. What a moment it was. Minnie you are such a clever girl! Quentin, happy and lovely as ever cyled round the payground of his nursery school as we watched from afar. 

It can't be so long before we are back to feel those arms again......

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uWNaI02zSI]

Dutch Pea Soup! (and the birds)

A bit like the San Franciscian chouder, the soup came served in bread. A full (though small) brown loaf contained the pea soup that arrived on the table in front of me following James' recomendation. It was scrumptious, though slightly overfacing.... The dilemna came when the soup was eaten and I wanted to take the empty 'vessel' home with me, and James didn't agree. You can't do that! he declared.

But taking it home (and his empty loaf too) was exactly what I was going to do. And we did. We carried it out of the cafe in one of Liz's cloth bags, and after collecting her from school the lovely Minnie fed the birds (ducks, swans and seagulls) with the help of beautiful little Quentin, at the end of their street. I believe the creatures thought it was their birthday, the bread was fresh, tasty, and soaked with pea soup. But the food was mostly enjoyed by Minnie; she thought is was far to good to throw to the towards the open beaks!

Anyway, the delicious meal was well and truely shared. 

Scheveningen in the sun and cold

We couldn't have wished for better weather, and Liz got to use her luxuriously warm duvet coat, much to Wad's disgust. Great walking along to beach, though Quentin was eventually too cold and we had to retreat into the warmth of the exposition building developed to inform folks of the ongoing improvements in the resort. We stayed at the Doll's House, thanks to the gracious generousity of Ilse, who moved out once more to allow us warmth and comfort of the Fisherman's cottage. Liz and Wad stayed with James, after a small cleaning exercise and in the end all was good. Ilse cooked us a deliciously authentic Indian meal on the first evening, and James made us welcome on the second night with an amazing vegetarian Italian dinner. Yum. Whilst we relished the pleasures of our beautiful grandchildren in the next few days, Liz and Wadd visitied the famous Royal Picture Gallery Gallery in the Hague  Mauritshuis, and the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam. They had a ball, and us too!

Then the snow came. On to Tilburg.

White Wickets

Cathy and Rob moved here in 2011. My lovely niece and her husband Rob have set up their new home in the Sussex countryside, and visiting them was a great pleasure…to say the least. I can't help thinking of Lynne, my dear sister (and Cathy's Mum) who died nearly 30 years ago, and how proud she would be of her girls. Cathy misses her Mum dreadfully, as we all do, but she certainly has lots of Lynne's passions and drive for the best things in life! 

Robert, Patrick and Tom it was so good to see you, and thanks for making us welcome. White Wickets is a area, and so are you.

We'll be back; and Paul will have his tennis court paint brush!